Today's post is inspired by this TED talk by Jay Smooth about the way people discuss race and racism, and this Washington Post article about how calling out racism is good for your health. To summarize, Jay Smooth wisely advises that racism is not an all-or-nothing state of being. Recognizing and dealing with racist thoughts doesn't work like this:

Racism is, among other things, a byproduct of how the human brain responds to social and cultural influences. Just as those influences are ongoing, dealing with racism is an ongoing process - like brushing one's teeth.

I am quite sure I've had a big green leaf of racism caught in my teeth from time to time. It is never, ever intentional and it is completely counter to my dearest beliefs, so it's really hard to admit that it happens... but it does. I don't think it's okay. I don't broadcast those (rare, I think?) thoughts, and I don't accept them as part of myself. I try to keep my mouth shut until I can find the mental floss - but if I screw that up somehow, I hope somebody tells me before it gets caught on camera.*** (EDIT: I don't really like how this paragraph turned out - I think I did a better job with the idea below. I'm leaving this here as an example of something I expressed that left me feeling really awkward.)

The social ramifications of racism are horrific and daunting. Recognizing and countering racism on an immediate personal level doesn't have to be. It's about what we do. It's about building good habits. Humans think all kinds of things, good and bad, shifting moment by moment - but just because we noticed a thought flitting through our brain doesn't mean we have to believe it. To invoke another metaphor, we get to (and have to) choose which thoughts we cultivate, and which ones we weed out.

*** Adding on to this three days later...

This post didn't feel done because I'm not sure I picked the right words above to express what I'm going for. I felt inspired watching Jay Smooth, so what I'm trying to do is go through some self-examination and then share what I find to be most helpful in moving towards the goal of resisting and overturning systemic racism.

One of the problems in working through this stuff is the word "have." In a culture where people are frequently identified by what they do and do not possess, saying I "have" thoughts can unintentionally imply that I identify with them. Maybe it's more accurate to say that I "notice" the thoughts. I think the gardening metaphor works best for me here. I don't plant weeds in my garden, but the wind blows and birds poop and seeds get into my garden that I never wanted. I don't claim ownership of the weeds. But because I do claim the garden, I own the responsibility of doing something about the weeds when they crop up.

So that's what I'm going for. I don't "have" racist thoughts - I don't claim ownership of them. I do notice problematic voices, words, phrases, and interpretations in my mind from time to time, and I own the responsibility to respond appropriately. I can choose to incorporate those words in my head into my outlook on life and let them shape my behavior (NOPE!), or I can say "This doesn't belong here." I 100% choose the latter. Weeds don't go away if you pretend they don't exist, they go away when you dig them out.

...and if the weed is something like poison ivy, digging it out without getting a horrible rash is an involved process.